Saturday, November 1, 2008

Screwing with the English Language

I have invented a word which I, on the completion of this post, will submit to Urban Dictionary.

Behold: the world's first self-referential word.

tad‧stoop \'tad-stup\ adj : A person who does not know the definition of "tadstoop."

"You're a tadstoop."
"A what?"


On a different note, think of all of the common phrases that we say that make no sense whatsoever.

1. "Thank you"/"Bless you"/"Damn you"/"F*** you"/etc.: Without the subject in there, this almost sounds like a command, in which case it should be "___ yourself." Is it so hard to squeeze that "I " in there?

2. "Thank God": Similar to #1, but it's even more strange. I would expect this one to be more common among the fundies.

3. "No thank you": This is even worse than #1, because the "no" doesn't even belong there. If you want to throw out the subject, still, it should be "don't thank you." Alternatively, if you want to keep the "no," it shoudl be "no thanks for/to you."

4. "You're welcome": Welcome to what? It makes even less sense when looked at in context:
"Bless you."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
What? I'm welcome to sneeze on you? I'm welcome to be thankful to you?


One last thing:

Check it out. I tried feeding the least sensible paragraph in my knowledge (Miss South Carolina's abysmal response) into it, and got this:

i purson@lly belive taht u.s. americanz0rz r unable 2 does zo b/c, uhmmm, some peepul, outs thar n are nation don’t has maps en uh, i believe dat oor, i, education liek such az uh, sourff africa, + uh, tehz iraq, everywere lyk such az, anbd i believe taht thae shud, uhhh, are education ovr hear in tha us shud halp ff' u.s., uh, should halp souff africa, itz should halp iraq and da asian ocuntriez sew we wiull b able to bild op our phuture, phor us.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

tha length off the hypotenuse of a rite triangle r equal two the sqaure rout of the some of the sqareses of it's too legs.